We have only one life and we should make it as best as possible. It’s nothing special, that we all making mistakes, from different reasons. We also have to remember, that life is simple, only people makes it difficult. Life is simple, also doesn’t mean it’s easy and pleasant, sometimes we have to make hard choices.
When someone will do something wrong or against us, we can get angry and now, the question is what to do? What is the best solution? Of course everything dependns from situation and circumstances. In most situations we can discuss and explain what and why had happened. Consequences are the next step. Mistakes can happen to anyone, we should understand this, because it can happen also to ourselves. Maybe not exactly the same thing, but it doesn’t change a fact. People are different, they think different, so it’s possible, that someone made mistake because, didn’t realised what it means for us. No matter the reason is, we can give second chance or not, it’s depends from us.
It’s about being good, forgiveness and so kind… but be careful, because second chance not always mean: ok I’m forgiving you, try again.
This may happen once and only once. The person have chance to change and now everything depends from this person. Remember, no excuses this time.
Because when you will give another chance for the same mistake, you are not giving a chance at all. If you want to say, it’s good to forgive that’s why I’m giving you one more chance, you are doing something bad. I’m very serious about that.
When someone f… up, there is only one chance, each next one, mean, that you are allowing this person for doing it over and over again. If someone used his chance and still doing the same mistakes, there is very small probability to change it.
The next chance in this case is to not allowing for reapiting this situation, is to end this.
In other way, this person won’t change and will be encouraged even more to keep this kind of behaviour, because will know, another chance is avalible.
For better example let’s take relationship. When partner is cheating on you and it was once, you can forgive and give a chance. Here partner have two options.
First, to change and stop cheating, keeping in mind, that partner’s trust is lost and have to work to rebuild it.
Second, to make empty promises but still cheating behind your back.
There is also third option, but it’s more like variety of the second one. Partner will stop cheating for some time and rebuild trust, then start cheating again.
When partner is still cheating, the only chance for change is to end relationship. Otherwise partner will recive “permission” for cheating and lose respect to you.
If you put yourself in this situation, then you are hurting yourself and your partner too.
You have to decide, is it ok for you, to be cheated, or no. Complaining and arguing with your partner doesn’t change a fact, that in reality, you are allowing for this situation exists.
When you decide to finish relationship, you are giving clear signal, what for you is right and what for you is wrong.
When you decide to end relationship, you are giving a chance to your partner for change, because your partner then, is losing you and only this can be a reason to see, that this kind of behaviour is not allowed and recived chance is wasted.
In other words, if first chance to change didn’t worked, second have to be different.
You cannot change someone, who don’t want it by himself.
Other example can be about work.
If you are the boss, and you catch your worker on stealing, you can give him a second chance (first was hiring him, in relationship, first chance is being with you) and keep your employee at work.
But if your worker will steal again, will he stop when you give him another chance?
After first time, your employee should try as best as possible and proof he is worth of trust.
If the situation is repeat again, the other chance for this worker is to fired him.
Maybe in next job he will not do it again, realising the consequences.
Don’t allow for stealing, it’s not good for both, boss and employee. If you know, that your worker is in difficult situation, there are other things to help, but never allow people to consider wrong behaviour can be justified.
Demoralizating others is not a good thing, it’s harmful for them, their families and rest of society.